unmarked grave

Another view.  This bothered me.

If you go to the bottom of the hill – and turn around – there’s a nice little riparian area.  And it has a well-maintained path and it has park benches – and the various types of trees have informational plaques.  

ash sign

3 24 2015 forest sign trunks leaves 2

Linked to Carpe Diem Writing Techniques #12.  Please read the entire post – our host Chèvrefeuille put so much work into his overview of techniques. I’m adding a condensed version here – to help process all of the information. 

Our task was to write a haiku using any of the following techniques – and to indicate our choice of technique. Would you call this “baransu” or “juxtaposition”? 

*1* Juxtaposition:
Including two images / ideas that are opposites – yet “have a resonance with each other that will evolve a revelation” (Robert Spiess).

*2* Onomatopoeia
Using the sound of words or of vowels / consonants to evoke a feeling or describe an event or an item.

*3* Repetition
Using words / sounds several times for emphasis or to increase intensity.

*4* Surprise / Impression: 
Catching a moment or a feeling.

*5* Comparison:
In the words of Betty Drevniok, “the SOMETHING and the SOMETHING ELSE are set down together in clearly stated images. Together they complete and fulfill each other as ONE PARTICULAR EVENT.” She rather leaves the reader to understand that the idea of comparison is showing how two different things are similar or share similar aspects.”

*6* Wabi-Sabi:
“Wabi” is simplicity and humility; “sabi” is a sense of aging with dignity, grace, and beauty.

*7* Karumi:
“Lightness”, spontaneity, childlike wonder, and unhindered expression.  As much a “lifestyle” and/or frame of mind as a technique.

*8* Free-style:
Modeled by Santoka Taneda, “free-style” haiku don’t necessarily use 5/7/5 syllables, kigo, kireji, etc., but they do maintain the spirit of haiku.

*9* Baransu:
Balance by association – coined by our host Chèvrefeuille.

over the unmarked grave
an ash tree
and its name

3 24 2015 cemetery potters field entrance 2


31 thoughts on “over the unmarked grave (haiga)

  1. I love how the last line arrives from the reader’s blind side, with a jolt, so that you kind of take a step back and say “what just happened? what does it mean?” It takes a while to get the topsy turvyness of the situation into focus properly. Skilfully arranged, as always 🙂


    • Thank you so much, Blake — i’m glad the haiku reflected what I was actually feeling at the time. What a jolt to find this place!
      And … I had every intention of doing something about this place this summer. And. Never did it. (Because of ….)

      Thanks 🙂


    • Thanks Delores — yes, I guess it could be wabi-sabi too, now that you mention it.
      And yes. The good wishes are much appreciated. I think this will be a battle. 😦


  2. Talk about juxtaposition … unmarked twisted unkempt grave yard with trees marked along a well swept path … all near traffic … disturbing … hopefully they will get this place back into some sort of order … like the little cemetery you wrote about last year.


    • Not much is happening with that cemetery either. The deep recesses of that site are well-maintained — it’s that little pocket of 5 people near the road that worries me. They’re squeezed between two businesses and dangerously close to that “eminent domain” area – where utilities and the road could be a threat. Squeezed between that too-narrow fence. Perhaps I’ll ask about that site too – when talking with the commissioners about THIS one.

      But yes. SERIOUS juxtaposition here.


        • Without a doubt, several of these folks have to be homeless. And our county doesn’t seem to tolerate them very well. There was a wooded area near the Interstate where they used to take shelter — and the county’s solution was to raze the woods. No kidding. It’s sitting wide-open and barren now.


        • It’s so sad the “success” is so important that there’s no room for anything else —- to go as far a raze a woods to deprive people of shelter, is just not my idea of civilization … and I’m not saying it’s much different anywhere else. This is a sad sad era we live in, and we think we’re”illuminated” (speaking of the philosophical movement from which grew our beloved capitalism – not Zen),


        • It’s not my idea either. But – they figured “if there’s no shelter here they’ll need to move on and it won’t be our problem and we won’t need to think about it.”. Sad. Pathetic. Infuriating. But….


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